Not so different: The difference between men and women is down to the way they were brought up, scientists claim

Scientists would have us believe that men and women are so different they could hail from different planets.

But a new book claims the difference between the genders is down to the way we are brought up.

It says the idea we are hard-wired at birth, as promoted by 1992 bestseller Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus, is outdated.

In fact it is nurture, rather than nature, that has the largest effect on skills, attributes and personalities. So boys aren’t born with better map-reading and parking skills.

And girls don’t come into the world able to multi-task and communicate better.

Instead, we are steered towards gender-defined skills by parents and teachers. According to the book, Delusions of Gender, by Cordelia Fine, a Melbourne University psychologist, there are no major neurological differences.

There may be slight variations in the brains of women and men but the wiring is soft, not hard. Dr Lise Eliot, of Chicago Medical School, agrees. She said: ‘Children don’t inherit intellectual differences.

They learn them. They are a result of what we expect a boy or a girl to be.’ ‘Yes, boys and girls, men and women, are different,’ Dr Eliot told the New Scientist. ‘But most of those differences are far smaller than the Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus stereotypes suggest.’

‘Every skill, attribute and personality trait is moulded by experience.’ Professor Robert Plomin, of the Institute of Psychiatry, in London, said: ‘People ignore huge similarity between boys and girls and instead exaggerate wildly the tiny difference between them. It drives me wild.’